Blog Archives - Joe Elvin

BlogJanuary 14, 2019January 14, 2019

That awkward moment when you realise no-one’s listening… 🙁

It’s painful…

It’s demoralising…

It makes you feel two feet tall…

What’s more, if it keeps happening, it’ll ruin your chances of success in any field.

After all, how are you meant to…

make new friends;
convince new employers of your awesomeness;
pitch a business idea;
find a boyfriend or girlfriend;
create a popular YouTube channel;
sell anything to anyone;

….if you can’t speak in a way that makes people want to LISTEN??

The ability to speak in a compelling and charismatic manner is a crucial life skill.

Thankfully, it’s a skill than can be improved with practice — and it’s easier than you think!

My buddy Ciaran Callam and I created this video where we teach a student, Luke, how to tell EPIC stories.

In the video, we ask him to speak about one of his passions.

When you speak about your passion, you naturally radiate enthusiasm. This draws people in, even if they have no interest in the topic.

Luke spoke about mountain biking for 30 seconds. He did a pretty good job…

How to tell a great story

We knew he could do better though…

So we made him tell it again…and again…and again. Five times.

Each time, we asked him to add a new element of epic story-telling.

These elements are:

Focus on emotions. How did each part of the story make you feel? Were you excited, nervous, terrified? Were your legs trembling? Was there sweat dripping down your face? Emotions help to make stories more relatable.
Paint a picture. Add the five senses into your story. What could you see? What could you hear? Could you smell, feel or taste anything? How did these senses make you feel? This helps people feel like they’re actually there experiencing the moment with you.
Play with your voice. Make sure there is variance in the speed, volume and pitch of your voice. This is a great trick to keep people’s attention. You can speak slowly and quietly during tense moments. Shout dramatically during the punchline. Take dramatic pauses for added impact. Have fun with it.
Body language. Tell the story with your hands and facial expressions as well as your voice.
Add an extra 30% energy (just so you can). A lot of our clients complain that they can’t capture keep people’s attention in hectic environments, like a crowded bar or music festival. It’s perfectly possible. You just need to add extra energy and volume. (Luke does a great job of this at the end of the video 😉 ).

Compare his first and last attempts at this challenge. This will show you what a difference these tips can make.

Even better, try the challenge yourself…

Follow our instructions, film your five attempts and see how quickly you improve 🙂

But what if I’m shy???

Shyness doesn’t physically affect your ability to add any of these elements to your stories. You could probably do a great job of completing this challenge with a trusted friend or family right now.

If you’re shy, the struggle tends to occur around people you don’t know that well. An internal voice kicks in, telling you not to be as expressive or free-flowing. It might say that people don’t want to hear your stories, or that you’ll embarrass yourself by expressing your full personality.

The best way to beat these voices is to prove them wrong.

Get used to communicating using the skills listed above. It’ll become natural, the more you practice.
Approach strangers and start sharing stories. It might seem scary at first, but often you’ll notice them becoming compelled by what you have to say.
Even if they’re not interested, you’ll teach yourself that this isn’t a big deal. Nothing terrible happened. They just weren’t your kind of people…

The best way to overcome shyness is throw yourself into scary social situations. The more you do this, the easier it will be to express yourself with conviction.